Monday, January 25, 2010

THE LEGEND OF BICYCLE BOB.

Imagine this picture at the bottom of the post. or somewhere creative throughout the blog. I'm technologically challenged some days... split personalities..

I know I posted something very recently… but that was because nick made me.. The tale I am about to tell I have taken upon myself as my civil duty and responsibility to pass on to the generations of loiterers. The Legend of Bicycle Bob. He’s the solo bum of the Latrobe Pennsylvania area. He’s FAMOUS. His autograph would sell on Ebay for enough money to pay for college. And im not even talking about BYU. Even a REAL college. Too bad I don’t think he writes… anyways every child growing up in Latrobe hears of Bicycle Bob.. then one day all the kids rush to one side of the bus nearly tipping the piece of crap over smushing their faces up against the windows just so they can get their mental picture of… yes.. Bicycle Boob. Nobody knows exactly where he came from but legend has it his parents are filthy rich and he chooses to live.. well in such a way…My first encounter with him he was walking around a fire in the middle of the field drinking milk out of the carton.. this was one of the smushing ur face up against the bus window moments… I was young.. Senior year I got my CLOSEST encounter with him. There I am sitting at the table by the window in ceramics class probably working on my moms Christmas present when all of a sudden! Bicycle Bob himself! rolls up on his bicycle.. he was smoking.. something.. and he looked in the window then rode as fast as he could (well maybe he could go faster but it was pretty dang fast) down the row of windows and around the circle in the parking lot then he was gone. It all happened so fast.. like a dream. Now this encounter was after he had made a large break through. The word was all over town.. Bicycle Bob went MOTOR. He no longer peddled his ancient bike around but he had a MOTOR BIKE. Not a motorcycle… a MOTOR BIKE. Good thing he didn’t switch to a scooter… the legend of Bicycle Bob would be… well It would lack the ring it has… There most definitely is something wrong with the man… he grunts.. and walks into eat’n park and pours his ice cream on the table so he can eat it with his hands. He’s seen talking on pay phones.. but most likely to himself. The Legend goes that his sightings around town are in between his frequent nights in jail… but he always gets out… and is then seen again. Maybe his rich parents bail him out. Is it possible to be banned from a town? If so theres talk he’s been banned from Ligioneer.. a neighboring town of Latrobe. There's even a facebook group for this man with 2000 fans! Id give you the link but then you'd see I stole this picture from it and that would be embarrassing… and a little sketch. I am not currently residing in Latrobe anymore… but I am sure that THE LEGEND OF BICYCE BOB LIVES ON. And I think all sightings of him need to be documented. I will now quote some version of Eragon.. or the Sandlot.. either way HEROS GET REMEMBERED BUT LEGENDS NEVER DIE.

2 comments:

  1. I love this! This is true. I have had a close encounter with Bob and couldn't help but stare. The legend lives on! :) :) :)


    and btw you wrote bicycle boob, which made me laugh :) haha and wrote bicyce/

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  2. i ment to write bicyle boob. thats why it wasnt in bold ;)

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