Friday, March 12, 2010

I would like to apologize for my extended absence. I was conducting a rejuvenation and soul-searching process in Cambodia, and unfortunately, the local starbucks did not offer complimentary wi-fi for me to "hammer out some blogs," as Jolly-Old-Santa-Nick would put it. In a further complaint, when I ordered exactly "half of an eleven pound black-forest ham," starbucks failed to deliver, quite literally as I also requested for them to deliver it to my place of residence. I contented myself by writing a letter of protest to the manager, in Khmer. It read as follows:I'm afraid I may have lost my professionality in the letter. I accidentally split an infinitive in the third line, and possibly dangled a participle in the eighth.

To conclude, I would just like to say how delicious black-forest ham is, and loitering, that's delicious too. I plan on registering it with the US Census Bureau so America can have accurate statistics about its taste in food. I also plan on marking "other" as my ethnicity, because I've always wanted to be one of the "others" from Lost. Now that I know they are their own ethnicity, it answers so many questions about the show...

Well, to end, I would like to offer express thanks to Nick, and and thank him for his patience in not kicking me off the blog, or "taking care of me," as he's hinted for the past month, or doing something else similarly sinister. Once again, thanks Nick.

4 comments:

  1. You're lucky you thanked me Sterling... I might even promote you up to Administrator for that... None of the other authors have thanked me. And I will be unavoidably detained for the next two years and will need someone to take the reins of all power...

    One Administrator to rule them all!
    One Administrator to find them!
    One Administrator to .f askdf all!
    And in the DARKNESS BIND THEM!
    WHA HA HA!

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  2. Ouch Nick, after all those years we spent in DI? You still owe me for dumping hot glue on my arm...

    And this post is absolutely hilarious, well done Sterling

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  3. Nick, I enjoyed your 'Lord of the Administrators' quote. Although if you so choose to knight me an administrator, I understand the responsiblities to maintain a humorous and highly sarcastic blog, and will treat the mantle with respect. It's all up to you though, Lord Saur--... I mean Gandalf the--... I mean Nick.

    (And thanks James, I appreciate it =D)

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